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Things To Do While Watching The Lord Of The Rings Trilogy
By: Various People
These are great. If one of you is brave enough to try one of these,
send me an email. I have to warn you,
however, that some of these may get you kicked out of the theatre. It's probably best to do these on a second or third viewing
of the movie, so you know when the specific parts are coming up. If you have anything to add,
email them to me.
- Stand up halfway through the movie and yell loudly, "Wait... where the hell is Harry Potter?"
- Block the entrance to the theater while screaming: "YOU SHALL NOT PASS!"
- After the movie, say "Lucas could have done it better."
- At some point during the movie, stand up and shout: "I must go! Middle Earth needs me!" and run and try to jump into the screen.
After bouncing off, return quietly to your seat.
- Play a drinking game where you have to take a sip every time someone says: "The Ring."
- Point and laugh whenever someone dies.
- Point and laugh when Frodo gets his finger bit off.
- Ask the nearest ring-nut if he thinks Gandalf went to Hogwarts.
- Finish off every one of Elrond's lines with "Mr. Anderson."
- When Aragorn is crowned king, stand up and at the top of your lungs sing, "And I did it.... MY way...!"
- At the end, complain that Gollum was offensive to Ethiopians.
- Talk like Gollum all through the movie. At the end, try to bite off someone's finger and fall down the stairs.
- When Shelob appears, pinch the guy in front of you on the back of the neck.
- Dress up as old ladies and reenact "The Battle of Helms Deep" Monty Python style, in front of the whole theatre.
- When Denethor lights the fire, shout "Barbecue!"
- Ask people around you who they think is the next "Terminator" sent from the Middle Earth of the future to assassinate Frodo Baggins.
- In The Two Towers when the Ents decide to march to war, stand up and shout "RUN FOREST, RUN!"
- Every time someone kills an Orc, yell: "That's what I'm Tolkien about!"
- During a wide shot of a battle, inquire, "Where's Waldo?"
- Talk loudly about how you heard that there is a single frame of a nude Elf hidden somewhere in the movie.
- Start an Orc sing-a-long at the part when they're banging the ground and making noise (before the battle of Helms Deep in The Two Towers).
- Wander throughout the movie theater muttering, "they stoles it from us. trixies little hobbitses. they stoles it from us, and we's wants it."
- Make lightsaber sounds during the battle sequences.
- After watching all the movies in a row you walk out of the movie theater with a split personality.
- Drool all over your chair when seeing the massive battles and when you get awkward looks, say you are the mouth of the Anduin river.
- With every mistake in the movie, stand up and loudly tell the theater people how it went in the book.
- Recite the entire movie in elvish.
- Plan the next 4 times you will be going.
- Stand up proudly as Aragorn takes his crown and shout: Long live the King!
- Claim that it's not that foney on the screen but you who is the heir of Anorien.
- Demand Lambas bread at the concession stand.
- Whenever they show a shot of Sauron's eye, recite the "Clear Eyes" commercial in your best imitation of Ben Stein.
- Whenever Eowen kills the Witch King, stand up and shout "You go girl!"
- Whenever Aragorn gives his "Braveheart-esq" speech to everyone just before the battle, stand up and shout "Preach it, white boy! Preach it!"
- Have you and your friends count outloud everytime Legolas or Gimli kills an orc, then argue who won at the end.
- At the end of Return of the King, stand up and shout "Hey! Where the hell was Saruman?"
- If you are one of those annoying people who are just looking for something to be an idiot about, stand outside the entrance protesting because
of the lack of representation of minorities in the trilogy.
- As you're leaving, ask a complete stranger: "Wait, I don't get it... it says Return of the King, but Elvis wasn't even in the movie!"
- When they go in the paths of the dead, wait for tense moment and shout, "I see dead people!"
- When Shelob comes on, exclaim, "Man! Charlotte's really let herself go!"
- Imitate what you think a conversation between Gollum, Dobby and Yoda would be like.
- Remove the top off your drink, then proceed to light the straw on fire and tell people in the seats around you about a great battle that
took place in your cup long ago.
- Release a jar of daddy-long-legs into the theater during the Shelob scene.
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